March 8th makes the switch to Daylight Saving Time. This change can be viewed as harsh, losing an hour of sleep, or positive, gaining an extra hour of afternoon sun.  Minor changes happen to our calendars but change in our lives and businesses can introduce major stress or significant benefit.  Life and business changes can radically affect us because they play with our brains.  Both positive and negative change activates the conflict sensors in the brain which causes stress, (Harvard Medical School, Dr Pillay, Psychologist).  The brain doesn’t discriminate between good and bad change; a new marriage or a divorce both induce anxiety or uncertainty.  The brain is comfortable with habit and old patterns so “newness” triggers stress and stress often results in uncertainty.  That’s why I’m much more likely to be safe and comfortable with the status quo rather than want to grit my teeth and work on changing.  So how do we cope with this change?  The brain needs a time-out when it’s faced with unpredictability.  If you don’t know if you’re going to the dentist or a party, you have trouble predicting your reaction.  75% of people presume the worst when faced with ambiguity... Read more

We have a three car garage and can’t fit in one car.  The dog crate, lawn mower, free weights and bench, power washer and woodworking area have expanded to crowd out any hope of parking my car.  It’s full. When my aunt died and the family needed to sell her house, we went into her garage and discovered one narrow path from door to freezer with boxes stacked everywhere else from floor to ceiling.  It was full. Sometimes I have a hard time setting up appointments with clients because they need to bus their children to school, carpool to baseball or soccer games, or be ready to retrieve them from ballet, piano, karate or swimming lessons.  Their schedules are full. Several years ago when a person was alone and talking out loud, they were considered crazy.  Now they are merely talking on their cell and when they hang up, Pandora is their companion.  Their ears are full. I’m not saying any of these things are bad, it’s just that our lives are full to overflowing with items we don’t need, noise that keeps us from thinking and identities that are defined by how busy we are.  We have so many responsibilities, so many things, so many opportunities and so many activities we... Read more

This month, love is scheduled for the 14th, and you better be ready!  Social pressure and guilt are reserved for the unprepared.  When we were first married, my husband thought we would just stop in at a restaurant after work and celebrate.  It was a shock and disappointment when we discovered every restaurant in town had reservations and waiting lines until close to midnight.  Lesson learned: think ahead. So, some years we have deliberately celebrated the day before or after.  Love is important and deserves to be celebrated more than one day a year but eating out or ordering long stem red roses can break the bank.  Still, it can be special even on a budget.  Here are seven ways to show your love (with or without a fancy restaurant reservation). Write a love note and put it on your Love’s computer, pillow or steering wheel.Cook (or order out) a favorite meal and eat it in front of the fireplace (with no TV on).Go for a walk together and afterward sit down and share a coffee, tea or hot chocolate.Do one of your Love’s normal chores (i.e. take out the trash, wash and dry the dishes) without being asked.Text a love note to your Honey in the middle of the day.Rent a movie... Read more

This month, love is scheduled for the 14th, and you better be ready!  Social pressure and guilt are reserved for the unprepared.  When we were first married, my husband thought we would just stop in at a restaurant after work and celebrate.  It was a shock and disappointment when we discovered every restaurant in town had reservations and waiting lines until close to midnight.  Lesson learned: think ahead. So, some years we have deliberately celebrated the day before or after.  Love is important and deserves to be celebrated more than one day a year but eating out or ordering long stem red roses can break the bank.  Still, it can be special even on a budget.  Here are seven ways to show your love (with or without a fancy restaurant reservation). Write a love note and put it on your Love’s computer, pillow or steering wheel.Cook (or order out) a favorite meal and eat it in front of the fireplace (with no TV on).Go for a walk together and afterward sit down and share a coffee, tea or hot chocolate.Do one of your Love’s normal chores (i.e. take out the trash, wash and dry the dishes) without being asked.Text a love note to your Honey in the middle of the day.Rent a movie... Read more

It’s already the first week of the new year and I haven’t landed on any resolutions yet.  My usual ones – lose 10 pounds, go to the gym more, read more books – seem like a repeat of last year and a cop out.  Plus, I normally stick to these for a few weeks and then quit.  My resolutions feel more like a guilty obligation rather than a life changing, driving force. This morning someone asked me not what my new year’s resolutions are but what do I really want this year.  That question seems more significant than just going to the gym three times a week instead of two.  It made me stop and think “what do I really and truly want?”  My focus needs to be on importance rather than the superficial. So this year I want to be more content with what I have, to enjoy at least one beautiful thing each day, to speak with kindness and patience when my first inclination is to condemn or hurt, to trust God to protect and provide instead of stressing with what I still need to do, to be calm, to be generous, to forgive myself without giving up on me, and to let go of my right to be right. I still would like to lose 10 pounds, go more often to the gym and read thoughtful books.  But... Read more

It’s already the first week of the new year and I haven’t landed on any resolutions yet.  My usual ones – lose 10 pounds, go to the gym more, read more books – seem like a repeat of last year and a cop out.  Plus, I normally stick to these for a few weeks and then quit.  My resolutions feel more like a guilty obligation rather than a life changing, driving force. This morning someone asked me not what my new year’s resolutions are but what do I really want this year.  That question seems more significant than just going to the gym three times a week instead of two.  It made me stop and think “what do I really and truly want?”  My focus needs to be on importance rather than the superficial. So this year I want to be more content with what I have, to enjoy at least one beautiful thing each day, to speak with kindness and patience when my first inclination is to condemn or hurt, to trust God to protect and provide instead of stressing with what I still need to do, to be calm, to be generous, to forgive myself without giving up on me, and to let go of my right to be right. I still would like to lose 10 pounds, go more often to the gym and read thoughtful books.  But... Read more

People are spiritual by nature; we search for reasons and purpose and meaning. There are mysteries we don’t understand and a whole universe we need to explore. Deep down, the drive to be better either compels or convicts us. People are also creative by nature; the urge to make something new – to give birth – excites us. We secretly long to be inspired and to imagine what could be and long to give it voice. But the spiritual search is easily overshadowed by the desire for daily comfort or security. And creativity can be lulled to sleep under the blanket of busyness and media noise. When either the spiritual or creative side is sublimated and ignored, we are diminished. The articulation of our feelings and communication of our beliefs often requires a different expression. Art. But art is creative and needs time and space and risk. To be quiet and wait can be frightening; to face a blank piece of paper or canvas can be terrifying, but the possibility of a poem or painting or concerto or dance that represents meaning or injustice or peace is exquisite. Art can free the feelings and beliefs that are stuck inside. And the best news is that the process of creating art is the key. The... Read more

People are spiritual by nature; we search for reasons and purpose and meaning. There are mysteries we don’t understand and a whole universe we need to explore. Deep down, the drive to be better either compels or convicts us. People are also creative by nature; the urge to make something new – to give birth – excites us. We secretly long to be inspired and to imagine what could be and long to give it voice. But the spiritual search is easily overshadowed by the desire for daily comfort or security. And creativity can be lulled to sleep under the blanket of busyness and media noise. When either the spiritual or creative side is sublimated and ignored, we are diminished. The articulation of our feelings and communication of our beliefs often requires a different expression. Art. But art is creative and needs time and space and risk. To be quiet and wait can be frightening; to face a blank piece of paper or canvas can be terrifying, but the possibility of a poem or painting or concerto or dance that represents meaning or injustice or peace is exquisite. Art can free the feelings and beliefs that are stuck inside. And the best news is that the process of creating art is the key. The... Read more

Have you ever said, “I’m not artistic; I can’t draw a stick figure”?  I have good news for you: stick figures are not the yard stick for art.  The world is full of opportunities to “do” art.  This month is National Wilderness Month (celebrating the 54th anniversary of the Wilderness Act), and there is such a thing as Earth Art or Land Art which allows all of us to be creative.  You can take a trowel and carve circles in the dirt and make art. Earth Art began in the United States in the 1960s as a rejection of the traditional notion of confined galleries and museums where “true art” could be bought and sold and displayed.  It was an embrace of nature and a celebration of found objects as art and beauty.  The very transient nature of the designs were part of the art’s essence. Because this creative expression couldn’t easily be displayed in galleries, it opened the experience to everyone.  Anywhere there were rocks or leaves a person could arrange art.  And this frees us all to be artists!  In my hallway by the front door, I have a large bowl with stones I’ve collected, and my grandchildren can’t resist stacking them into towers.  A farmer in Simi Valley can’t help but plow a... Read more

Have you ever said, “I’m not artistic; I can’t draw a stick figure”?  I have good news for you: stick figures are not the yard stick for art.  The world is full of opportunities to “do” art.  This month is National Wilderness Month (celebrating the 54th anniversary of the Wilderness Act), and there is such a thing as Earth Art or Land Art which allows all of us to be creative.  You can take a trowel and carve circles in the dirt and make art. Earth Art began in the United States in the 1960s as a rejection of the traditional notion of confined galleries and museums where “true art” could be bought and sold and displayed.  It was an embrace of nature and a celebration of found objects as art and beauty.  The very transient nature of the designs were part of the art’s essence. Because this creative expression couldn’t easily be displayed in galleries, it opened the experience to everyone.  Anywhere there were rocks or leaves a person could arrange art.  And this frees us all to be artists!  In my hallway by the front door, I have a large bowl with stones I’ve collected, and my grandchildren can’t resist stacking them into towers.  A farmer in Simi Valley can’t help but plow a... Read more